stoner achievements lists

i thought these were kinda funny and i’ve done most the stuff on the list so here you aree…

Stoner Achievements List #1:

Prometheus – Supply a lighter to a friend in need
Tarzan – Smoke a joint while sitting in a tree
Underage – Toke up as or with a minor
Undercover Brother – Go to work high
EZ Baked – Make weed cookies/brownies
Party Foul – Spill the bong water
Green Gills – Drink the bong water
FUUUUUUUUU – Get your weed jacked by a cop
Flying Nina – Smoke outside all night
Nug Ninja – Blaze atop a restricted building
Day Walker – Smoke outside in public during the day
One MIllion Mile High Club – Get really baked and have sex
Visiting The Grandparents – Grand Daddy Purp
Surf n Turf – Smoke on a beach
I’m On A Boat – Smoke on a yacht
Smooth Criminal – Smoke with a cop in the vicinity
Voice Of Reason – Smoke out a straight edge person
Keep It Tight – Roll a blunt that lasts 20+ minutes
Michael Phelps – Swim in a pool while high
Rugged Smoker – Smoke on a hiking/camping trip
Climb The Ladder – Meet your dealer’s dealer
Doctor’s Orders – Get a green card
Shotgun Wedding – Smoking out a weed virgin using only shotties
Rehab – Successfully take 3 shots of vodka in between pipe hits without coughing
Phew – Get searched by a cop with at least an eighth on you and don’t get caught
Woodstock – Smoke freely at an outdoor music festival
Han Solo – Enjoy a relaxed night smoking by yourself
P.I.M.P – Smoke out 2 or more girls at once without any guys there (male achievement)
DICKS EVERYWHERE – Smoke out 2 or more guys at once without any girls there (female achievement)
Chillin’ with Jimi – Smoke Purple Haze while listening to Hendrix
One Ring to Rule Them All – Blow a perfect smoke ring
Arctic Fires – Smoking Northern Lights
Friends With Benefits – Smoke with at least 6 people you know at the same time

getting a little heavier

Stoner Achievements List #2:

Spielberg – Form an entire movie plot in your head while stoned
John Wayne – Smoke at a scenic spot and watch the sunset
Dr. Strange – Smoke before being hypnotized
The Joys Of Parenting – Smoke herb you’ve grown yourself
Ah Grasshopper – Smoke up a teacher/professor
420 Challenge – Smoke 4.20 grams to yourself without leaving your seat
High As A Kite – Smoke pot and fly a kite
How Romantic! – Smoke on a first date
Ahhhhnold – Go to the gym high
Potsomniac – Smoke before bed each night for a month
High, Family! – Go to a family reunion blazed
Keep It In The Family – Get a family member onto the herb (be the first to smoke them out)
Promise Toke – Get your girlfriend/boyfriend into weed (be the first to smoke them out)
The Cat’s Meow – Smoke out a cat successfully.
Wheel and Deal – Sell at least an ounce of weed in a 24 hour period
Lucky! – Find some bud you didn’t know you (still) had and smoke it
Circle Of Pieces – Get a group of 5 people together and each person lights up their own piece
The Collector – Collect at least 10 pieces
Firefly – Use up an entire bic lighter in a day by yourself
Honor Student – Smoke in a school area while kids are playing
Smart Shopping – Go impulse shopping while baked
Boxed Out – Without smoking get high in a hot boxed area
When Life Gives You Lemons… – Smoke every kind of weed substitute
When The Clock Strikes – Smoke weed whenever it’s 4:20 any where in the world for a week
Clash Of The Titans – Get 2 people who hate each other to smoke together
Feels Good Bro – Smoke ‘till you can’t feel feelings anymore
Man Of The Hour – Be the last person to come down
A Toast To That – Get drunk while high
Green Faeries – Drink absinthe during a sesh
Elephant In The Room – Smoke with someone who weighs more than 300 pounds
Executive Suite – Smoke in a swanky hotel room

you’ve finally made it

Stoner Achievements List #3:

Conquistador – Do something you normally would be too scared to do high
Every Man For Himself – Everyone brings their own weed and everyone smokes together each with their own
Good Samaritan – Find weed in public
Black Market – Buy from a stranger in public
Merchant Class – Sell to strangers in public
Following Through – Smoke a cig after a blunt
Apple Of Eden – Smoke out of an apple
Like Father Like Son – Smoke out a parent
Mona Lisa Overdrive – Get blazed on the highway while driving
Major Tom – Get high while in outer space
Green Is Green – Pay for a service or item with a nug
Medic – Smoke out a sick friend/family member
Girl Scout – Sell homemade edibles
Ground Control – Help out a friend who gets too blitzed
Lola – Smoke with a tranny
Tin Man – Use tin foil in a homemade piece
Vintage – Smoke out of a piece that’s at least 30 years old
American Beauty – Smoke with a friend’s parent
The Early Bird – Wake and bake every day for a month
Chemical Warfare – Smoke a bowl from a gas mask hooked up to a bong
Catalyst – Smoke with 3 people who have never smoked before
March Hare – Make weed tea that actually gets you high
Bad Influence – Get a nonsmoker to become a regular smoker
Mike Mulligan – Dig up some greens in what was thought to be a finished bowl
Battle Of Wills – Smoke somebody out until they can’t keep smoking
Lance Armstrong – Smoke weed and then bike for at least an hour straight
The Snack That Smiles Back – Smoke from a bong with a live goldfish in the water
Helping Hand – Hold the flame over somebody else’s bowl for them
Triple OG – Smoke a blunt while sippin’ hard liquor
Commitment – Buy a $150 or more piece
Bloodshot – Get an ID photo taken while high. Bonus points if it’s an official document: passport, driver’s license, government department employee ID, etc.
Not So Green Now! – Buy weed from a dealer without assistance from friends
Fat Sack – Buy an ounce

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