Submitted by japansk8r90 on Mon, 12/13/2010 - 11:35am
The 42.0 Commandments of Weed
1. Thou shall never pass a cashed bowl.
2. “Corner” the starting hit on a bowl or and piece, it will show that you care about the next person getting at least SOME greens.
3. Thou shall always change the bong water before smoking.
4. A blunt is only smoked by the roller, provider, and anyone else invited. Don’t be a Snoop Dog.
5. Thou shall never covet thy neighbors weed.
6. Thou shall never be addicted to this wonderful plant.
7. Thou shall finish ALL the food they have ordered off the dollar menu, for it shall not go to waste.
8. Thou shall pass the bowl/blunt/and weed smoking device to the RIGHT(clockwise) for that is the designated direction.
9. When awoke, thou shall wake and bake if stash is a plentiful.
10. When car is baked, thou shall continue to bake car until cigarette is needed, where the car windows will be cracked slowly until car is aired out.
11. Thou shall fix a trailing blunt.
12. When confronted about weed by the police, thou shall deny deny deny until safe to expose and smoke again.
13. Those who smoke alone shall not text those who don’t have stashes plentiful about how high they are.
14. Those who smoke should NOT smoke after a plentiful amount of liquor, for it will induce vomiting for most.
15. Those who are packing a bowl should put a tiny nugget the bottom, so when inhaled hard, no “sucking through” is permitted.
16. Thou shall never say anything about the great weed in school or during school, for it will make you a big red target for the deans.
17. Blunts are the safest way to smoke, because evidence is smoked away, and bowls and bongs provide the most flavor, choose wisely depending on conditions and settings.
18. Thou shall use clear eyes only when needed, such as at Christmas Dinner after a quick joint out back.
19. Thou shall never release any information on fellow stoners to aid in police investigations, for it will only deter you from future purchases and fun times.
20. Thou shall not deny the sale of a ten sack (sabuck) or g because they are “too big of dealers.” Share the wealth people.
21. The safest way to transport weed? Crotch it, but don’t wear saggy pants and underwear for it is useless then.
22. Those who smoke amazing weed and have such for “personal use” shall at least smoketh it with one other person so they can as well enjoy the flavor and awesomeness.
23. Thou shall never reply in the words, “Huh?” “What?” or give a dumb look when asked questions by police or parental figures.
24. Thou shall haveth ye eyes chinked when stoned.
25. Thou shall smoke on 4:20 am and pm whenever possible, for it is the time of the weed.
26. Thou shall smoke as MUCH as humanly possible on 4/20 of any given year.
27. Those paying for the weed shall choose who packs it and ALWAYS get the first hit, unless specified by themselves.
28. Thou shall not smoke the resin of another mans pipe, for it is not their resin to smoke!
29. Thou shall not nigger lip(No offense or racial remarks whatsoever).
30. Thou shall share whatever food can be spared when fellow stoners have the munchies.
31. Thou shall not cash the bowl unless they are 100% sure it is cashed, verify with fellow smokers to be sure.
32. Thou shall not smoke in someone elses car without getting approval.
33. Thou shall not tell a story when you are holding the smoke, everyone else is more concerned about what you are holding rather than what you are saying.
34. Thou shall not mess up rotation, for you will be skipped as a penalty fee.
35. Thou shall NEVER smoke another mans weed without asking first.
36. When smoke is blown in your face, thou shall inhale it, why? To not waste ANY weed smoke at all costs.
37. When starting rotation two of any bowl blunt or whatever, always start where you left off, so nobody feels left out.
38. Thou shall share thy drink with a fellow who has “cottonmouth.”
39. Unless otherwise stated, the driver of the vehicle has 100% rule over the radio and/or cd player. BUT….NO COUNTRY.
40. When providing the weed, it is not complimentary to take a EXTRA HIT because its “your weed”.
41. Rules of Clambaking and Hotboxing
a. Clambaking is filling a car or room with weed smoke
b. Hotboxing is sitting in your bathroom with the shower on blazing hot, and clambaking the bathroom, and when done, stand up and inhale the remaining smoke that has accumulated on the top half of the bathroom. Try it, and don’t forget to stand up after sitting down the WHOLE time you smoke.
42. GET BAKED AND LOVE THY FELLOW STONER