Whenever I get on this site. Giving out free upvotes to everyone. "You get an upvote! And you get an upvote! Everybody gets free upvotes! Look under your chairs. It's a free upvote!"

Tonight I picked up a sac and hid it in my bra. When I was changing for bed I realized I had forgotten it there. Now my tits smell like dank weed. Yay! Pot Boobies!

People always tell me that because I do drugs I'm gonna die, well statistics show that 100% of people that don't do drugs die.

it would be dope if there was a radio station where a few dudes just talked while they were high as fuck. the station would play some good, chill music and the dudes would have awesome conversations between songs. id listen religiously

i was going to this small handmade clothes shop, and as i walked up to the door i noticed a little post-it on the door saying " shop will be closed from 4:15 till 4:25." so i walked behind the store and they where sparkin up a blunt.
WIN.

There should be a sarcastic font for text messaging. That way everyone can tell if you're being sarcastic or not. Patent Pending.

Dear Rappers,
You like, maybe love, weed. We (your listners)LOVE weed. Cops do not love weed, nay, they hate it. Why? ......I..I just dont know, man. This being said, why in the F**K would you put police sirens fading in at the end of songs that you KNOW we will listen to while smoking. Franticly we have to pause the song, possibly even skip it, to see if the siren is real or not. This doesn't make dollars or cents/sense. It makes pot-heads paranoid...that's it. Other than this keep up the fine work. That is all.

I think watching a girl take a fat bong rip is one of the sexiest things on earth

So nothing was open at 2am except the pizza pizza in the next city which i KNEW was out of their range, i called anyways....For some reason the guy delivered the pizza anyways, he gets to my house and says "Wanna burn one?" So he smokes ME a joint, gives me an XL pizza and 25 wings for 12 bucks!!! This man went out of his way to save me money and get me baked. I love you pizza man.

ok so over the weekend my girlfriend made me quit smoking, but my roommates are total stoners. so since we've been dating for 5 years and i havent been smoking for nearly as long i didn't smoke with my roommates this week. but since i still wanted to have fun in their company i decided to document everything they did until someone went to sleep. so i started documenting at 2:24am and didn't finnish until 4:33am with nonstop writing, something is written down for almost every minute.... read more »

so i am a girl stoner who has smoked out of anything and everything. however, when it comes to joints and blunts, i always have my guy friends to roll them up. so i decided it was finally time for me to learn the real technique of rolling. so i called up my friend who is a very good roller and asked for a lesson. he told me that blunts 101 class with begin at 4:20 sharp and to bring a sack and a swisher. i watched as he showed me the technique and i helped him at times. tomorrow i have blunts 102 which is the lab. i have to roll it all on my own. and the final exam is to smoke it :)

Sex and weed are really awesome. Anal and heroin probably feel better, but they're both too dirty and risky for me to try.

Just because I'm always blatantly getting high at my window doesn't mean you have to stop hiring me to babysit your kids. Come on, I need your money to buy weed

I was just wondering if back in the day she gave head? I mean does she get down on her knees and sucks a guys dick? I mean shes the fucking queen.

Imagine if somebody actually had 101 Dalmatians. You'd have so much shit to clean up.