Buy a forest. Adopt 8 midget babies every year (mixed race). Be the only non-midget around and raise them to think you're their god.

they'd be all high tech, almost completely frosted white, super thick glass to fit some kind of interactive touch screen computer inside, and apple logo. It would tell you your heart rate while your holding it and measure the volume of smoke you milk. And you can download apps to make the whole thing glow neon colors and shit.

..iBONG. ye or nay?

If Samuel L. Jackson knocked on your door and you opened it and he said"C'mon Mutha Fucka! Get your shit and lets go, we gotta mission to complete!" wouldn't you follow him?

Wouldn't it be cool to have something with exactly 420 votes?

Yes, yes it would be.

Don't up-vote on this when it gets to 420!

random stoner, in your car
i can see you from afar.
high myself, from where i sit
i could see that monster hit.
i hope that you wont mind my stare
as you spray glade into the air
i saw you here the other day,
light one up and rip away
someday when im not late for class
we will surely pass the grass

I noticed my glass of ice tea was rippling and I thought "dinosaurs!" before "loud music"

Ok, someone has to come up with stoner achievement points. For Example:
Achievement Unlocked! Talked to parents high over the phone - 10G
Achievement Unlocked! Go through Taco Bell Drive Thru three times in one night - 50G
Achievement Unlocked! Parallel park a car - 40G

Leave achievement ideas to start our list going.

butter and "I cant believe its not butter" do you get "I can sort of believe that some of this isnt butter"?

ok so i live on the circle of a caul de sac, and one of my neighbors who lives a few houses down (hes like 40 + married), and sometimes late at night he'll drive his truck down & park it at the end of the circle where my house is the only house around, and he smokes weed. My mom just came into my room and was like "do you see that car?? it's been parked there for a while...maybe i should call the cops, they could be doing something suspicious..." and i convinced her not to, and that she was just being paranoid. I got your back, friend. always looking out for fellow stoners :)

If you already have a beard, picture yourself with two beards.

i smoke cigarettes n honestly i dont even know why. I guess i started threw peer pressure n i sold em at school in like the 4th grade lol. I just smoked a fat bowl n usually i smoke a cig after a blaze sesh but not this time. I just broke all my cigarettes n im taking a stand. This will be hard but i will never smoke a cigaette again.

I would never leave my house. Like, how profoundly fulfilling would that be, to make your dog laugh like a goon?

is the asshole that was just like "hey im gonna make a virus for computers and piss everyone off real good", fuck that guy!

Think about it. It's a slow build up then... BOOM! You feel totally relieved and have to wipe up your snot afterward.

We would totally be in the house HUFFlePUFF. With a name like that? Gotta be the stoner house. And on top of it Pomona Sprout, Professor of Herbology, is the Head of Hufflepuff House. I bet she grows some dank magical weed. JK Rowling, you sneaky woman, you thought no one would notice.