You were on your way home when you died.

It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.

And that’s when you met me.

“What… what happened?” You asked. “Where am I?”

“You died,” I said, matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.

“There was a… a truck and it was skidding…”

“Yup,” I said.

“I… I died?”

“Yup. But don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies,” I said.

You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?”

“More or less,” I said.

“Are you god?” You asked.

“Yup,” I replied. “I’m God.”

“My kids… my wife,” you said.

“What about them?”

“Will they be all right?”

“That’s what I like to see,” I said. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s good stuff right there.”

You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man. Or possibly a woman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t have time to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s any consolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”

“Oh,” you said. “So what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”

“Neither,” I said. “You’ll be reincarnated.”

“Ah,” you said. “So the Hindus were right,”

“All religions are right in their own way,” I said. “Walk with me.”

You followed along as we strode through the void. “Where are we going?”

“Nowhere in particular,” I said. “It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”

“So what’s the point, then?” You asked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”

“Not so!” I said. “You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don’t remember them right now.”

I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders. “Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot or cold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.

“You’ve been in a human for the last 48 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for long enough, you’d start remembering everything. But there’s no point to doing that between each life.”

“How many times have I been reincarnated, then?”

“Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in to lots of different lives.” I said. “This time around, you’ll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD.”

“Wait, what?” You stammered. “You’re sending me back in time?”

“Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I come from.”

“Where you come from?” You said.

“Oh sure,” I explained “I come from somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you’ll want to know what it’s like there, but honestly you wouldn’t understand.”

“Oh,” you said, a little let down. “But wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point.”

“Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don’t even know it’s happening.”

“So what’s the point of it all?”

“Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously? You’re asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”

“Well it’s a reasonable question,” you persisted.

I looked you in the eye. “The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature.”

“You mean mankind? You want us to mature?”

“No, just you. I made this whole universe for you. With each new life you grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect.”

“Just me? What about everyone else?”

“There is no one else,” I said. “In this universe, there’s just you and me.”

You stared blankly at me. “But all the people on earth…”

“All you. Different incarnations of you.”

“Wait. I’m everyone!?”

“Now you’re getting it,” I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.

“I’m every human being who ever lived?”

“Or who will ever live, yes.”

“I’m Abraham Lincoln?”

“And you’re John Wilkes Booth, too,” I added.

“I’m Hitler?” You said, appalled.

“And you’re the millions he killed.”

“I’m Jesus?”

“And you’re everyone who followed him.”

You fell silent.

“Every time you victimized someone,” I said, “you were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’ve done, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you.”

You thought for a long time.

“Why?” You asked me. “Why do all this?”

“Because someday, you will become like me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”

“Whoa,” you said, incredulous. “You mean I’m a god?”

“No. Not yet. You’re a fetus. You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born.”

“So the whole universe,” you said, “it’s just…”

“An egg.” I answered. “Now it’s time for you to move on to your next life.”

And I sent you on your way.

Made popular on: 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 8:42pm


Comments

 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 10:52pm

i'm sober and that blew my fucking mind

sincerely stoned,
the chronisseur

 
 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 10:57pm

Wow nice if this is true it makes sex a little pointless though lol

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 10:30am

Yeah having a good sex life is basically being a chroni masturbator in this situation.

"Cannibalism? Racism? Dude, that’s not for us ... those decisions are better left to the suits in Washington. We’re just here to eat some dude!"

 
 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 11:06pm
 
 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 11:08pm
wauiwowie Says:

oh my god if this is true then i have been each and everyone of you stoners and you are all actually me in different times well... hello my self make me a grilled cheese

 
 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 11:17pm
zakkvudoo Says:
 
 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 11:20pm
Twixy Says:

Dude.. fuck... ooh wow...
That was awesome.
<3 Toke Up, M'Lady.

 
 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 11:26pm
seanyp812 Says:

wowwww dude i have a post that relates to part of this and its so nice to see it put so perfectly in a story like that holy jesus where did you find this? i would really like to know the original author/ what his favorite drugs were

 
 
Fri, 09/17/2010 - 11:54pm
moke4life Says:
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:07am

WOW.........JUST.........WOW
AMAZING!

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:26am
Hotsuma53 Says:

hands down best highdea all time
I think, therefore I am...

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:34am
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:37am
fart Says:

this is awesome, I'm gonna read it again once I'm high

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 2:08am
samantha69 Says:

fuuuuuck man,
that left me dazed and confused!
haha but its sooo crazy!

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 2:11am

Seriously, just changed everything.

That was some crazy shiiiiiiiiiiiit...Fuck

I pop no style, I'm strictly rude. ^.^

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 2:18am

THIA IA MIND BLOWING WOW REAL REAL NICE IT GOT ME THINKING MAN THIS ACTUALLY MAKES A WHOLE LOT OF SENCE MAN WHILE I WAS READING THIS I WAS IMAGINING THE WHOLE SCENERIO MAN NICE

King_Scryve-Aztlan Recordz Family Entertainment

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 2:32am
Libstar Says:
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 2:34am

oh. my. fucking. god. no pun intended

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 2:48am

Wow..sucks im not high..but my minds still fucked up over what i just read lol

Good shit though :D

Las Vegas,Nevada

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 2:49am
Black Says:

That was one of the most amazing things I've ever read.
:D

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 3:15am
Killer-K1 Says:

This is pure amazing. Blew my mind, man.

~Smoke Moar. Stay Lifted. :]~

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 3:19am

this is amazing.. where did it come from?!

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 3:56am
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 4:21am
supergrass Says:

changed my life, thanks broha :)

.p.p.s.y.c.h.e.d.e.l.i.a.a.

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 4:44am
.BLAISED. Says:

the religion of unity.
being aware of all things as one conscience.

ha, goosebumps.

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 5:49am
Frenchs420 Says:
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 7:06am
-Z- Says:

I was so high reading this was a task, but I am glad I did.

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 9:37am
HazeWindu Says:
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 11:21am
slytherica Says:

But this also means that we are everyone who oppresses us.

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:21pm

This is incredible, but you really shouldn't post other people's shit on here. It's unethical.

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:26pm
–Sou Says:

I like this way of thinking. Consider writing a short story.

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:43pm

Dude, that means that every time you're having sex, you're fucking yourself.
__________
http://www.ahappybrownie.blogspot.com

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:47pm

fucking amazing. All the god/no god arguments and opinions usually make me sick every1 has the riter to there own opinion but still every1 should believe in some type of god

 
 
Mon, 11/12/2012 - 12:47pm

Why should everyone believe in some type of god? Is there any proven benefit in believing in things without any verifiable evidence to support it. I have no evidence to support the idea of unaided human flight, should I believe in it do ya think?

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 12:54pm

Dude That blow me away. We got to smoke a bowl

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 1:06pm
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 3:14pm
sexpig13 Says:
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 3:28pm
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 3:54pm
kinglax Says:

Damn dude, I posted a simpler highdea a little while ago that was basically this concept, that we're all one. That's crazy

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 4:29pm

just some mindfucking/mindblowing shit

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 4:32pm
milkweed Says:

my mind is blown this you should write a book and then become the president/king of something like Asia or England this is the best post ever

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 8:14pm
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 8:46pm
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 9:24pm
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 10:08pm
daaaaank Says:
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 10:58pm
paulaellen Says:
 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 11:26pm

THIS IS FROM FUNY JUNK! I POSTED THE SAME THING A WHILE AGO! i love it.

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 11:30pm

Sober...& my mind is fucking blown..
Crazy way to look at the world..

 
 
Sat, 09/18/2010 - 11:56pm

Holy balls man, I got the chills hella bad at the endd of that, I wish there was a way to save that or somethin I need to show every one in the world!! Haha but seriously that's some deep shit.

 
 
Sun, 09/19/2010 - 12:21am

absolutely mind blownnn, good shit goooood shit