But I found this one hilarious:

"I had a parent teacher conference with my 8 year-old son.
He had written "Chuck Norris" as the answer to every question on his test."

My kids will write "Morgan Freeman". Cause his voice is just melodic.
Why isn't he our president yet?

Made popular on: 
Mon, 09/19/2011 - 4:58pm


Mon, 09/19/2011 - 10:53am
Metrev Says:

charlie sheen wins 10x more than that old actor.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 12:49pm
yoinkie Says:

What has Charlie Sheen won at recently? Correct me if im wrong, but in the last year hes been addicted to drugs, doing dirty scallies hoes, and getting fired from a hit TV show. Just because he throws around a catch phrase "winning" doesnt mean hes winning at anything.

Chuck Norris on the other hand has been winning since before you were born.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 2:38pm
AFWF_Erick Says:

He wins sales on all his t-shirts and other products promoting his catch phrases that people buy. Unfortunately.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 3:10pm
k4y14hhh Says:

Actually, he bangs seven gram rocks and finishes them. The stuff he was on would make Mick Jagger look like a droopy-eyed armless child. Do you see Charlie looking like a droopy-eyed armless child?! He also has the blood of a tiger as well as that of Adonis. Charlie IS a drug. If you try it once, though, your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body. I'd take Charlie over Chuck any day. Chuck is a religious, conservative bastard.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 4:44pm
BrainArt Says:

Are you being serious? I think its stupid how people think hes cool. Like really people follow celebrities on the dumb shit they do and ignore all the other important issues. Just fall in line and blindly agree with the man on t.v. and why do you defend him? would he defend you? Probably not.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 10:29pm
k4y14hhh Says:
Wed, 09/21/2011 - 1:54am

chuck norris was winning before chuck norris was born

Sat, 05/05/2012 - 10:15pm
CANPackie Says:

At least we can all agree Bruce Lee can kill Chuck Norris as done before.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 11:46am

...I wonder how tasty a hamburger on a stick woud be...

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 2:39pm

Well sir, I believe it would have the same quality of taste as a hamburger unattached to a stick, unless this so called "stick" was burnt which would give the hamburger a smokey, distinct taste which may or may not correspond with your tastebuds.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 2:45pm
Mon, 09/19/2011 - 3:41pm

I wonder what a coconut head tastes like....coming for that ass, man. I'm coming.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 8:42pm

Just imagine a Waffle House waffle covered in syrup. But not covered in syrup, covered in coconut milk (aka my semen)

Tue, 09/20/2011 - 2:01pm
Mon, 09/19/2011 - 4:21pm

Charlie Sheen's winning 'cause of all the money he got for breach of contract from 2 1/2 Men.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 5:28pm
Joben21 Says:
Mon, 09/19/2011 - 5:41pm

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for chuck norris.

When Chuck Norris goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Bruce Lee.

Mon, 09/19/2011 - 5:59pm
RabiesTX Says:
Mon, 09/19/2011 - 7:57pm
Baken Says: