Submitted by NotHilarious on Wed, 06/06/2012 - 3:54pm
1 - a.) They should make a manual chainsaw. It would be simarly structured to a regular chainsaw except instead of being motorized, there would be a crank that drives the chain, kinda like a bike pedal. It would require less effort than a regular saw, be cheaper up front and in the long run than a regular chainsaw and not rely on fossil fuels.
1 - b.) If frogs were the size of people, what the hell would they eat? They can live on flies and insects now, but those are relatively large in comparison to their bodies. Maybe the could eat way more flies, but that sounds like a pain in the ass honestly.
2 - a.) Somebody needs to combine body wash and deodorant into one thing. That way after you shower in the morning you don't have to waste that 15 seconds putting on deodorant, cause itd already be done. Think of what you could do with all those extra seconds. (besides masturbate).
2 - b.) My friend said he recently smelled a scented candle that smelled just like his ex girlfriend. Upon hearing that I immediately had two thoughts. First, they probably all do because his ex smelled oddly like wax and second, I doubt I'd ever find a candle that smelled like my ex. I dont think a "dumb cunt" candle would sell all that well.
3 - a.) Why has no one created a Hot dog that is filled with condiments? That is the very definition of one stop shopping.
3 - b.) Bath salts are the new drug trend. If I'm being honest I don't 100% understand it, but from what I've heard it has similar effects to PCP. I think they could eliminate the negative and violent tendencies that come with it though, if they mixed the bath salts with bubble bath. You'd have a tough time getting naked and eating a homeless man's face when you are spending all your time lathering up a big foamy Santa Claus beard.
4 - a.) Site Suggestions: This site should include a chat, plain and simple, but I'd also really love to see sections. Apparently, highdeas used to get divvied up into sections based on their content. This I think would stop a lot of the bitching about posts, because people could go directly to the sections they like most. If they want a story, boom story time. Invention? Boom invention section. Also, I think it would be cool to have a place to just browse your friends highdeas, like a live feed of theyre postings.
4 - b.) If you ever break a shoe lace, but have a few zip ties, you dont have a problem, you have the start of a fashion revolution.
5 - a.) If you want to lose weight and save money, when making a sandwich, cut your bread in half so it is only half as thick. This will make it so you only have to buy bread half as often, and will save you about 100 calories per sandwich.
5 - b.) My memory is terrible these days and I constantly lose shit. Growing up my mom always told me "you'd probably lose your head if it wasn't attached." That got me thinking though...maybe the headless horseman wasnt an evil villain, he was just a forgetful dude who didn't listen to his mom.
BONUS WEIRD SHIT!!!
- That song "we can dance if we want to, we can leave your friends behind" is a fucking weird premise, man. We can do a lot of things if we want to, like learn to play the fiddle or jackhammer a sidewalk, but I don't see why you have to stop being friends with everybody to do it. Besides that fact that if your friends don't jackhammer a sidewalk and if they don't jackhammer a sidewalk, then they're no friends of mine.
- I've spent years perfecting my David Hasselhoff impression. Not really, but I do own a red bathing suit.
- How poor was the family that coined the phrase "family jewels" referring to their testicles? I can just imagine the reading or that guy's will. "to my son, I leave the most important of all my estate, the family jewels, my severed balls."
- "There's more than one way to skin a cat." Too bad there is no reason. All these damn methods are going to waste, because we have no purpose. We as a people need to unite and come up with reasons to skin a cat