When I drive stoned, I get better gas mileage; therefore I save gas and money, and help out the environment a little.

this guy at taco bell just gave me a free mountain dew. told me its "the best when you got the munchies"

The word, "you"... just look at it... "you" ... all 3 of its letters... read it over and over again slowly pronouncing each sound of each letter..
...i feel like that spelling is a little funky.. did we decide that an "o" should be in there so we don't look japanese? there's so many other ways we could have spelled that word and still make sense..

Imagine if all the celebrities that smoke weed (Seth Rogen, Willie Nelson, Megan Fox, Michael Phelps, Snoop Dogg, etc.) team up and make a legalization benefit organization. They all raise money and do fundraisers to donate to help get weed legalized. They could also do commercials to fight for marijuana legalization.

i love drinking the crumbs at the end of a bag of chips its almost why i eat the chips

The last time I was caught smoking was in high school, I made the argument, "This is HIGH school not SOBER school."

Just think about all the people you look/glance at in a day that don't see you look at them.

Now think about how many people look at you in one day that you didn't even know about

I literally just got why Eminem calls himself Eminem...
Marshall Mathers... M&M... Eminem. Wow. I feel retarded.

Every time you lite up your smoke would form into a beautiful pearly white cloud that would follow you around your house and talk to you with an awesome Jamaican accent! Also whatever food you were most craving your cloud buddy would poop it out right onto your lap! Every stoner needs a Jamaican cloud buddy...

Does anyone else have a routine when they smoke.Like stuff you watch,and things you eat.